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It started with an argument

Dear Reader

Every now and then Ester Shindler pops up in my timeline. Every time, I smile.

I’ve never met Ester in person. My first contact with her was when she was Editor-in-Chief of (iirc) CIO magazine. They published an article that was not flattering to PHP and I wrote her to “discuss” it. The details are not important. What is important is that now 10+ years after that incident – an incident that could have gone badly, but because she is such an awesome person did not – I still see her avatar and smile.

Conflicts don’t always have to be a war of words. I know that it is the current thinking that if someone does you wrong – real or perceived – you out them, publicly shame them, bring to bear the full force of your tribe to beat them down.

Next time you are in such a situation, try to understand the other person’s point of view before engaging. Understanding is so important that Steven Covey made it one of the 7 habits.

Lucky for me Ester understood this. She sought to understand my point of view before engaging. Looking back, I wish I had been as wise.

Until next time,
I <3 |<