Postcards From My Life

Dear Reader,

1. Fins in FIRST
2. BCD next with the jacket open
3. Place your regulator in the jacket and then close the jacket over it.
4. Wet suit goes on top
5. Zip it up

I run this mantra about once a month with fresh new minds learning how to scuba dive. See, there is a right way to pack a wet bag, this way. At the lunch break, I am always happy to discuss the why with the students, but during class, the why is because I said so. I’ve got 350+ dives. I have made every non-fatal mistake that a diver can make. Additionally, there are thousands of divers all over the world that have tried every new idea you think you have for how to pack a wet bag and guess what, we all have standardized on this way because it is the best way. That is why we teach it as the right way.

For the past few years in tech, the prevailing attitude is “everyone should learn to code”. (that’s a whine for a different day) I believe that everyone interested should learn to code, but if you are going to learn, accept that there are right ways to do things and wrong ways to do things. In scuba diving, doing things the wrong way usually has pretty immediate and sometimes disastrous results. In software development, your ‘new way’ might work well for years. But doing things the wrong way will  eventually lead to a failure.

Please, on your own personal project, experiment all you want. Do things any way you want as long as you are the only person who will ever have to use or maintain the code. If there are other developers involved though, do things the right way. Do things the standard way, follow the community standards for the code you ware writing. If we all do this, everyone wins.

Until next time,
I <3 |<
=C=

p.s. We pack a wet bag that way to protect the regulator and console.  That is the most sensitive and usually the most expensive piece of dive gear. Fins are sturdy and cheap, they go on on bottom to protect everything from drops. Wet suits are soft and spongy. If something gets dropped on your bag, the wet suit helps absorb the blow. There is a reason we call it the right way.

Dear Reader,

At the end of March, 2019, I was let go from  a job that honestly, I thought would be the last company I worked for. (that’s a different whine) Most of you probably don’t know – not for any failing on your part but because you’ve got your own crap to deal with – is that I went into an emotional tail spin.

I did not, as I proclaimed loudly on Twitter, “crawl into a bottle of rum for the weekend”. I drink a lot less than I pretend to. :) I did not go into a deep bout of depression. But being fired as a developer shook me to my core. For whatever reason, the company walked away from me and my skills. I was let go from a company where I was doing the one thing I knew I could do well. It’s hard not to take that personally.

I handled this badly. I shut down emotionally. I withdrew from my community of friends. Honestly, I was ashamed, and I did not want to talk to anyone until I could hold my head up high again and proclaim “I AM A DEVELOPER”.

My community, my tribe, my peers, my friends, whatever you want to call them, are there to support me, not judge me. If they are secretly judging me then they really aren’t my friends to begin with.

I’m not out of the woods yet but I am better than where I was. I am now to the point where I can at least talk honestly about my journey. I am better because I didn’t shut everyone out. A few of my friends, continued to reach out, continued to talk to me, and continued to support me, even when I didn’t want them to. That and the continued love and support of the lovely and talented Kathy.

Yes, mistakes were made, but thankfully, I have enough people that love me enough to overlook that mistakes. Those people pulled my out of my hole when all I really wanted was to wallow in it.

To each of you – and you know who you are – thank you.

Until next time,
I <3 |<
=C=

Dear Reader,

That is MY rope. I EARNED my rope.  As part of my PADI Dive Master Certification (yes, the same training that almost kicked my butt) I had to learn to tie several knots and to successfully tie them underwater. My instructor handed each of us a piece of rope as he cut it off of a much longer piece. When asked, he replied that he gives every student a piece of HIS rope so they can learn.

In tech, we don’t celebrate individual’s wins as much as we should. When I was running a team, at every quarterly team lunch, I would hand out custom made badges that were modeled after the old Texas Ranger badges. Texas Rangers motto is (or used to be) “One problem, one Ranger”, so when one of my developers tackled a problem and completed it, they earned their badge. This wasn’t a participation award, you had to earn it.

Managers, take time to celebrate an individual’s wins. Even if they give it the “Aw shucks, it was a team effort” they need to see that you recognized their efforts and appreciate it.

Let your developers earn THEIR rope.

Until next time,
I <3 |<
=C=

Dear Reader,

In Humility: Part 1, I talked about a recent event that humbled me. In Part 2, I want to share another event that has shaken me and in this case, shaken a lot of arrogance out of me.

I am a Scuba Diver. In doing the work to earn my PADI Dive Master Certification, I was humbled yet again.

Part of the test is the “Dive Master Complex Problem”. I will not describe the problem, but a team of candidates have to solve a problem, underwater.

In 10 years of diving, I have always been comfortable with my skills. I’ve done things that pushed the rules before, but never anything that pushed me mentally and physically beyond my limits. The “Dive Master Complex Problem” pushed me past my limits. Even though I was in a pool and in less than 6 ft of water, I twice panicked and shot to the surface.

For someone who prides himself in his diving abilities, it was truly a humbling experience. It has fundamentally changed my outlook on diving and on my skill level.

Humility is a good thing. I’ve come through this test (Yes, I passed. No, not with flying colors)  and I am a better diver for it. If I decide to go for my Instructor’s Certification, I know that this lesson will shape how I teach people to dive. Yes, diving can literally be a life or death situation when things go wrong. Now, because I have been a panicked diver, I really understand that.

Until next time,
I <3 |<

Dear Reader,

I suffer from an overabundance of confidence. Two events though have shaken that recently. First, I was fired.

Many men of my era have their identity wrapped up in being a productive member of society and being the provider for their family. Being fired shook me to my core. Especially being fired as a developer, my primary vocation.

It has taken me a long time to come to grips with this event. At first it was humiliating. I’m not saying it is not still, but I am learning  to accept it, to get back up on my feet, to start moving forward again.

Humiliation is a good thing. It has forced me to take a long hard look at myself.  I know I will get a job again, I will be contributing again, and I will once again be providing for my family. I know that this too will pass. But I want the person that comes through this trial to be a better person than the one that went in.

If not, that means I did not learn, I did not grow, and I will be here again.

Until next time
I <3 |<